Wow Mirage thanks for that information. I actually saw alot of my XH in what you described. He appears to be doing both sides of the MLC. One thing that helped me to hear is the anger you felt towards your wife. Would you mind sharing with me about that anger you had towards her? Do you remember why you had such anger towards her? What triggered anger in you?
My Xh did seem to go through an internal MLC and then went external. He too was the life of the party, Mr. Social, so friendly and upbeat. A man in love with his wife and kids, and had no problem letting the world know about it.
Not sure if you've read my past posts, but XH was wounded in a shooting at work...via his now OW's XH, claiming they were having an affair. He still to this day swears that nothing was happening between them, but I have a very hard time believing it.
After the shooting he went into a very dark place as anyone can imagine he would. He left two times prior to the 3rd and final time, and filing for divorce. First time before the shooting, second time after...staying with the now OW claiming they were friends.
I do know when he left he was the lowest I had ever seen him. I was very concerned. He acted very bi polar is the only way for me to explain it. He could swing his mood 3 times in one sentence.
At times I couldnt tell if he was trying to initate fights with me just to be cruel....cause he was just down right cruel and tormenting with his words. I never knew he was capable of acting such ways, and speaking such hatred towards someone. Never had he ever spoken to me in all our 22 years together as he had a year and a half ago.
Im so sorry you had to go through MLC, but I am so grateful you came through it, and are here to help. Im sorry your XW went through it too. Ive worried I might go through it, but I realize when I start to have MLC thoughts....it's all because Im just overwhelmed with life....not in balance, and really not living authentically.
Yes this has helped. Anything else you'd like to share I'd be happy to hear.
