I'm happy for you Newman. Sounds like you are making progress with your changes. Yes its important for a woman to feel that the attention towards her is not always about ML, but make sure you continue to GAL. At this stage I found it was best if I pulled back just a little after H and I had a connection. It made him curious. I could tell by his body language. My H has the most obvious body language. He doesn't hide anything very well.
My sitch is really not too exciting, but you are welcome to read it. It starts with Alien Invasion. Long story short...My H first dropped bomb over 12 months ago, I thought we worked things out, then BD again and following this pattern every 2 months or so until April this year after an argument because he took up smoking after quitting 20 years ago. I was upset of course. He went into a rage and declared he would never change his mind about wanting D.
I made a few mistakes early on, then discovered DB and got a coach who helped me tremendously. I read and re-read the books to reinforce the messages and really stuck to the plan for almost 5 months. Then as I mentioned previously I took a leap of faith which paid off six weeks ago.
We haven't talked R or our problems. I am just trying to build on the positives. My H is MLC and is still in the tunnel so I have to be very cautious. At the moment things are going well, but his pattern has been to go into a rage and threaten me as in the past (recycling). My understanding of and different approach to his MLC seems to be helping and we are doing OK so far. I still GAL and look after myself because that is the most important thing to come out of this. I would not survive without GAL, this board, DB or the support I get here and from my wonderful friends.
