The crack in my perfect life...

[Sweetbriar]

My lawyer advised to do the refinance. Says she doesnt see where it would hurt me at all. In fact, would probably benefit me. The only hesitation is that it will benefit H and he will be able to move out of his parents, get his own place and do exactly what he wanted from the beginning. I know I shouldnt care, but I feel so burned by him, that I kinda wanted him to suffer at his parents for awhile! Anyway, H and I had text convo today...he claims that he wants to do this for the kids and I. He got upset that I contacted the loan officer and advised him that we were seperating....so I asked H, isnt that true? We are currently separated and you want divorce, correct? H says yes, that he loves me but does not want to be married to me, the we are polar opposites and that divorce is his plan. He says that he is in a very bad downward spiral right now and that he is upset that he cannot see his kids everyday. Well, his choices.

Is it normal for your STBXH to say he still loves you but doesnt want to be married? I guess thats kinda the same things as I love you but not in love with you?? H also texted that "whatever is wrong with us is unsolvable and deadly to all involved...I do care about you and want the kid and you to have a place to live. we will never see eye to eye, plus all the awful stuff that has happened between us makes "US" impossible" so after getting this, I just let it go...nothing else to say...he is totally convinced that we are awful for each other...

Went out tonight and hung out with friends, and got home a bit ago, because I had to pick up my kids from their Friday night fun. I need to start getting used to this life with no help....although like all my friends and family tell me, I did it all anyway!