My mother who is battling cancer for a second time came in to visit me at work today... Something about the whole sitch and her sitch with cancer and.I almost started balling.
Tough times ahead me thinks, gonna need a lot of support to stay strong.
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
it's okay to need support. Be clear expressing that.
Not necessarily from your w, but from your friends and family AND in today's world there are so many resources available in each community, avail yourself of them.
Cancern support groups are great. Try one.
As for the wedding, I'm glad you put the needs of another couple on THEIR wedding day, ahead of your pain. Good.
Don't try to mind read so much. If your w cried, who knows what that means? I can see it as a bad sign OR as a good one.
Back off and focus on YOU and what you are going thru, not what she is.
You just cannot know. So it's wasteful for you to worry about what you cannot know OR control.
What are you going to do to GAL this week?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Got my hours cut in half at work today. Lol, good times... Already found ways to supplement the income plus I will be able to focus more on the startup biz.
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
So it's been same ole same at the homefront, I decided to look into toastmasters as well as karate. Both are close by and non conflicting with work.
I will be going to the first free class on Thursday I think.
I will also be going to Cleveland for the startup biz end of month, right before W goes on her solo "clarity" retreat. This will provide a large window of separation between us and some time for me to detach.
Also with my hours being halved now I can work on some other projects while I wait for my hours to return before the holidays.
I received W's bday present today, I know she will love it. It's one of those thoughtful presents that she prolly has forgotten she even told me about.
Sigh.... Patience....
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
Anyone got any ideas on what else to do right now?
I am GALing , trying different 180's, detaching and visualizing the best I can be. I think it would be hard to get her to a retrouiville as she is not interested in anything religious.... I know its not really a religious retreat but it would still turn her off that it's a Catholic thing.
Anyone have any ideas of another retreat or anything?
I am looking into EE myself for next year..
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
Couples counseling has been going on for about 2 months now. MC says "W needs to figure this out instead of dragging it on for a long time" MC also says that we "have all the fundamentals of a healthy thriving M and that the lack of desire for me by W can be solved IF W commits to M".
She also knows that it could take lots of time to get to how she used to desire me. I think that scared W because neither of us have been happy sexually for a while.
The problem I am feeling is that I see no real change in W with anything I have been doing the past 6 weeks especially.
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
Be patient. These things take time. Also, have you heard the book ILYBINILWY? If you're still living together and no OM in involved it might help. I also really like The Love Dare Journal.
Read the reviews. They're good books. I wish all the best!
M 42 H 39 T10 (-2yrs separation) S8 D5 DD 7/30/11 (EA&PA) Reconciled 6/2013 Separation in works 1/2017
Working on computer systems at W's work to get some hours in since I just got ALL my hours cut at job...
While here fil mentions W's solo trip. Made me think to myself if W has told him or not... I will have to ask her, I will be very upset if she let her fil know yet I have been keeping all this from my family at her request...
I just want this to be over with already. Almost 3 months into it, feels like yesterday I was this panicky little baby. Now I feel more empowered and confident.
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
Making pancakes together for dinner, then watch a movie and hang.
I am going to a friend's house on Sunday for football and to catch up and general guy time. I have lowered my expectations of our sitch and have really started working more on me, this week has been tough with work laying me off but I know I will pull through it..
Me - 30 W - 28 M 4 t 6 ILYBINILWY #1 Jan - 2011 Band-aid Jan 11' ILYBINILWY #2 7/28/12
