I will write more later when I'm on a regular keyboard, but yes -- I successfully saved my marriage, five years ago. My wife had an affair, and applying these/DB principles ended her affair after just three (albeit horrible) months. There are, of course, no guarantees.
You can find my sitch by searching for my recently started thread called "Transparency."
You're confusing "ultimatums" and "boundaries." Don't feel bad -- most people do. I'll try to find you something good that explains the crucial difference.
