More patience??? Really???

[ces67]

Thanks NG. I know she has a lot to deal with. The problem is that she doesn't appear to be dealing with it in a productive way and its impacting the family.

When W left for fall break last Friday, she literally only at $67. That was no where near enough to cover gas of a 10 hour drive and food for trip. I scrounged up another $20 and gave her our last credit card for emergencies. It was probably enabling her but she had every intent on leaving and I didn't want her stranded with the kids.

Today I find out that during her visit with her friend, she went shopping and spent what little balance was left on the credit card to buy herself clothes.

So now, since I have restrained myself from addressing the money issues, we have maxed out our last credit card. Our savings is gone and we are fully on a pay check to pay check life. This is ridiculous.

I'm so mad at myself for not dealing with this better. She has said she's sorry for how she has handled money and I believe her. However she is still unable to make wise choices.

This has again, put me in a double-bind. And I walked myself into it. I am constantly put in a position of having to act as her "parent". If I address the money issues, I am controlling. If I don't the family falls further and further into financial chaos.

I know I am responding emotionally and need to step back for a bit. I called earlier to ask W about this and left a message. its been over 3 hours and she's not returned the call. I'm not surprised. Its probably best. I need to get to a better place before I talk to her as well.