I want to go camping.

[labug]

Thanks, jks and don't think getting to this place was easy for me. I've done a lot of difficult things in my life, from making end-of-life decisions with dying parents to diagnosis of a life-changing chronic illness in a child to being cheated by a crazy RE developer and this has been the most difficult.

But it's also taught me the most and has given me the opportunity to become who I want to be.

My H does the dodging thing too and the further I get on this journey, the less acceptable that is to me. You can't have a R with someone who is not fully present. You can try, and I tried for years, but unless both partners can be honest, open, active participants, it just won't work at least not to the satisfaction of both partners because just as they say we are controlling, their actions are also controlling.

You still have some rough times ahead but each one of those rough times you get through makes you stronger. When I'm in the midst of one, I even say that to myself, you are growing, you will feel so much stronger and clearer tomorrow (or the next day).

And it's always been true.