oh my, the tears keep on coming, I think I might go poop soon, I am so tired, feel so ill with dizziness, sickness from lack of sleep. The feelings of lost and loneliness are overwhelming. I dont understand why he cant see that we could make this if he would only try, it all feels so hopeless now. He says he wants no contact till after the legal separation and financial split is done and then 'maybe' we can be friends. How on earth do I do the DB'ing if he just wont see me. I feel utterly broken, I love him so very much and his friendship means more to me than anything in this world. The loss of my own identity feels huge - who am I without him. What happens now to all the dreams and goals and passions we shared, now what. This hurt is driving me insane. I want to believe we can make it, but I cant see how we can if he wont have any contact with me.
I feel like I am broken into a million tiny pieces and I truly don't know how I will put myself back together again. I have not been able to break contact with him, now I know i HAVE to no matter how long it takes. PLease please tell me there is hope.
