Keep breathing...

[mamabird]

Breakdown - I hear you. I'm also trying to learn to understand how I feel, why and communicate it properly. It's not second nature to stop and think about the why's but I think it's important to do.

After our shorts discussion this morning, I sent H an email offering an olive branch and letting him know I understood that he felt I was dismissing him. For some reason we always have this argument when it comes to clothes, and what is appropriate. I had this pair of shoes that he hated and said he wouldn't "be seen with me" if I wore them. I of course resented that he didn't like my shoes and wore them just to make him angry. (The shoes are gone now btw, even though I liked them).

Anyway, back to the email, I said that we needed to learn to talk and to listen so that we could have a discussion without it escalating into an argument. I don't know if he thinks it's ok to disagree. Like I said, I feel like he takes any disagreement personally, when all it is is a disagreement. He replied and said, "Fair enough," and he did admit that he felt that I was dismissive with him. So this all was a step in the right direction. I swear, learning how to handle disagreements must be at least half the battle.

When I got home he did as promised and washed all the dishes, which was so helpful, and I let him know that. We all had some cuddle time on the bed while we watched the baseball game.

But one thing out of sorts did happen: I found this email he had printed about revising his nutrition habits. My H isn't the healthiest eater in the world. No, he's not eating junk food but you're not exactly going to find him at the health food store. So I teased him a little about the email and asked him to let me know if he wanted me to change the groceries I was buying. He told me he's lost 10 lbs and I said, "Well that's just from starving yourself. But you do look good." Ugh, he got offended by that. I don't think he's trying to diet, I think it's from not eating dinner with us and being a little depressed. Then he got all huffy and said that I hadn't changed. Of course, I told him he looked good just the other day... I'm not sure if he was really upset or not, but it's good to know he's watching for the changes.