ML again sat. morning. Some closeness time too. It was ok but not feeling the big bang explosion of love i've been hoping for. Now i'm feeling claustraphobic and need some space. Don't know what i'm going through right now, depression seems to have kicked back in. Maybe i was hoping for instant solution to my problems, but now i'm thinking that I'm fooling myself and making it longer and more painful on both of us to even try.
I think it's expectations that can get us in trouble. I know, I'm the same way. I'm learning, though, that the best thing to expect is progress, and that there ARE no "instant solutions". I do a lot of whining on here about how much I want, need, desire some ML with W. However, at this point, I'm not even really certain just what that would bring me. I guess I'll wait and see. I think if I expect a huge love explosion, from either of us, I'm likely to be disappointed. Much better to expect some progress, and take things one day at a time...
W went to doctor for yearly checkup today. Dr. said that since she has no problems with her current Pill she didn't want to change the prescription on that, so W came back with a prescription for testosterone cream. We'll get that filled tomorrow and see how it goes. Dr. said it could be 6-8 weeks before seeing any results.
I find it ironic that "no sex drive whatsoever" is not considered a problem that would warrant changing her prescription! It is well documented that the Pill (a hormonal form of birth control) messes with libido.
I would have her re-visit this with her doctor next time she is in. In the meantime, I hope the T cream does wonders for ya!
I read here where the Pill drops your libido. In my relationship, the last time my wife actually HAD desire was when she was on the Pill, and she stopped taking it about 13 years ago. I was kind of thinking that going OFF the pill screwed up my wife.
Quote: I find it ironic that "no sex drive whatsoever" is not considered a problem that would warrant changing her prescription! It is well documented that the Pill (a hormonal form of birth control) messes with libido.
Honey
From what i gather 'no sex drive' was not what W presented to the doctor. W says the doctor said "Yeah, most husbands want more sex then their wives. If they understood the pain of yeast infections etc. etc. then they would be asking for a lot less". That quote leads me to belive that a sex life of 'twice a year' was not reported to the dr.
maybe i'm just grumpy and tired this morning, but i've been wondering why i'm not more optimistic. Right now i see that W is not doing this for me, but to avoid losing me...ie. under threat. Am i making a dumb distinction?
Quote: maybe i'm just grumpy and tired this morning, but i've been wondering why i'm not more optimistic. Right now i see that W is not doing this for me, but to avoid losing me...ie. under threat. Am i making a dumb distinction?
not really dumb, but perhaps your not looking at it the right way.
part of what you want is w to show love for you right? sure you want it to be in the form of physical desire for you but the fact that she's taking steps (even if small) to find a solution or reason for the problem is a good things and should speak to you. If you feel these attempts on her part are based on a threat well that too isn't such a bad thing...after all if she didn't care for you or love you a threat wouldn't get her to do anything.
No, I think we have all felt that way sometimes. Maybe I am wrong, but I know in my sit H felt/saw that I didn't care anymore and was in fear of loosing me, so he took the initiative and acted. Too bad the actions didn't last. The only thing that has lasted is a slight kiss(peck) hello and bye and good night, an occasional hug and thats about it. Its almost like he focused on those things I said were missing and thats all he can do. Otherwise we are still living like roommates. Maybe its time for a serious talk. problem with that is, I am almost at that "I don't really care anymore point" which is sad
I think the sad thing for me will be if I haven't resolved any of these issues and I am still writing about the pain on 3/27/2005. I am so glad that I found this web site. For me it really helps. Although, I am determined not to let another year go by without making a decision. Life is too short. Try talking Annette. I wish I could say from experience that it will help, I can't, but it's worth a try. Good Luck. Katie
Katie