Sam, The best thing you can do is put her comments and behavior aside and detach. She's acting liked a spoiled child and your plans should not have a thing to do w/her plans since she's not living under the same roof as you are.
Go, spend the time w/your mother. Life is precious and it's too late when our family members are gone. The situation w/your wife will be there when you return.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
