3 years aftet D-Day and i finally registet

[Am I Too Late]

I just reread the 1st line in my previous post.

I never lectured her or stopped her from going out, even after i found out it wasn't to just visit old friends, but to go out partying and not show up until 1:00 pm the next afternoon.

I "Thought" i was drawing a boundary, because i still carried on with my family and father and son activities according to schedule.

Well, now i think that all i accomplished was took away her motherly parental duties and i became her full time dependable child care taker.

I enabled her drinking lifestyle rather than allowing her to suffer consequences for being away from her family and son in particular.

To her, in her drinking, partying and cheating mindset, not being an active regular part of her only sons life was not an immediate consequence.

Oh, it probably kicks in sometimes or will in the future, on how much of his life she missed out on due to her selfish choices and gets her feeling guilty or ashamed, but not enough to let her see her choices were wrong for her child. She can always escape through alcohol and flirting, replacing her self esteem temporarily.

I sometimes feel like "Throwing That In Her Face", verbally, yet calmly, but whatgood would that due if she is not interested enough to Really care about her only son more than herself and her selfish desires.

Screw It...!!!

It's time for me to finally release her actions from affecting my life.

I honestly thought i was doing boundary setting in the past and now think all i did was ease her path to making her selfish choices by enabling her and minimizing her consequences.

I have things to do today so enough thinking about her and who she has become.

I realized over the weekend when i dropped off my son for a play date, that after i left, i really felt i had nowhere to go. I don't really have any, let's hang out together type friends. I have plenty of friendly acquaintances, but couldn't think of anyone i could just drop in at to spend some time with. I think my Best Friend is my son.

I am so grateful we are so close, but i guess i need more for myself too. I need to consciously seek that out for myself.

I used the Stop Sign in my head last night again when i started to dwell on missing my wife. I really do miss her though. When we talked, even throughout this past 3 year ordeal, i really felt comforted listening to her and her thoughts.

Could one of you point me out to specific thread topics that can help.

What exactly is, "Cycling"?

Also, with finances and digging out from property tax sales and foreclosures, and still being available for my son full time, what GAL things should i seek out?

Ed