So, continuation of sitch Arron a couple of posts ago. Wife of course went out after seemingly getting mad at me for daughter's words and affection. Anyway, I woke up this morning at around 4am which is normal. Went to make coffee, looked outside and W's van was not in the driveway. For a brief second, I was angry but it went away pretty quick( think that's a good sign for me). Anyway, made a cup of coffee and came down to the basement to work a little before the kids woke up. Worked a little, and went back upstairs about 4:30 or so for another cup of joe. I heard the keys rattle in the door! Uh oh! Here we go I thought! Anyway we have a hotel style latch on the front door that D15 must have latched. When W tried opening the door it just caught. She stood there for a second, I'm sure trying to figure out if she had to ring the doorbell. I think to her suprise, I opened the door and said " hey, sorry but not sure how the door got locked"! I was in a fairly chipper mood towards her, and didn't say anything about the time, where she had been, or anything. To be quite honest, I really didn't care that much. I went back over and continued to make my coffee, without saying another word(was whistling a cheery tone though). And W went up stairs to bed.
I continued to work in the basement for the next few hours. Guess it was about 10am or so, here comes the W. I was painting and I looked over and said in the best mood possible" Hey good morning, how are ya" and just went back to painting. She made small talk about the paint and things. I listened, and answered and acted like Huck Finn having the most enjoyable paint session ever! I continued to work and she went upstairs. Throughout the afternoon, she was in the bedroom apparently studying. She came downstairs a few times and started chatting about stuff. Nothin major of course. Saying how she couldn't concentrate with the noise outside, neighborhood kids, our kids playing the piano, etc. I was laying on the couch with D4 and Sons watching some Animal Planet show. She came into the LR and laid on the couch. We all conversed a little and I got up and continued in the basement.
About 5 or so, realizing what time it was, I started making dinner. She said "I'm not going to eat, I have to go somewhere to study". I said ok and continued to cook. She left soon after to do what ever it is she is doing. That's where I am now.
Of course part of me still have the same emotions as before, but they are nowhere close to being as strong. The wondering, the anger, etc. but for the most part, I really don't care where she is! Is this normal? Is this a sign that it's time for me to move on? Is this just pity I feel for her for being so f'n lost? I really do not know!
Can anyone provide any insight to what they may see? Is detachment working? I still need to post about her cake eating and get guidance. She hasn't really lifted a finger around the house for the last month or so. I refuse to live as roommates and feel used. I can't stop what I am doing because I do these things for the kids. She just reaps the benefits! I so damn confused!
