Wow - amazed that my post about Canada Girl and housekeeping got this discussion started! Thought you'd all think I was nuts...

Last night when I was writing about it, I had a flash-thought that if I'd married someone else perhaps it wouldn't have happened...I quickly buried that tho...because I'm with you Bug that I ASSUMED that I ought to behave a certain way even tho H said to me that he didn't expect me to do any of it.

I'm with you too SS that it's societal pressure/ expectations. I think little girls are conditioned/brought up to both nurture and please others, we are told we are "good girls" when we do. We are taught to put ourselves second, that it's ok not to be a winner, whilst little boys are taught that winning counts etc

What I can't get my head round is my resentment w doing the laundry, food shopping, cleaning etc? At least if I did those chores then the clothes I wanted to wear were clean, the food in the fridge was what I wanted to eat and the house was how I wanted it.

And another thing...when H did do anything I felt guilty. The only time I didn't feel guilty was if we were doing it together - like if I cleaned upstairs while he did downstairs.

These are my issues not his but they no doubt contributed to why he left

Tumbling

ME41 H39
T12 M9
Ilybinilwy 10/2010
H moves out 11/2010
H moves in 09/2011 out 11/2011
Try to fix it alone, give up 07/2012
Tumbling to file 02/01/2013 :-)
"Strong on the inside, soft on the outside"