Thanks for your insights. You are right I shouldn't be thinking that way, I'm still M and that's just not me.
What prompted that thought is that one day last week, I got an invite from a female coworker to go to lunch. She's one of the bunch of us that go to lunch, so her invite meant really nothing else but a lunch. But the sitch was, the the rest of the bunch were out that day and it was only the two of us. I declined the invite and just said I have errands after all for lunch.
I thought to myself why didnt I go, it was just a lunch and were adults nothing wrong with it. Plus my W during this ordeal have told me to find someone else, I told her no what I want is her.
Anyway, going back to that, I also thought I'm vulnerable and not thinking straight. The lunch might mean nothing but these days I've been craving attention from W and I do feel lonely.
Mind you that none of my coworkers don't know my sitch and I'm sure if that female would've known, she probably would've been awkward asking me.
Anyways, my thoughts are just flowing 24/7. I really need to stop obsessing, since the bomb every time I have free time all I think about is my sitch. I need to go back to my normal life.
I have IC at the end of the month, I'll bring this up to him.
Newman
me40; W43 M18; T~20 D18; S13 & S3 bomb 5/9/11 EA busted 4/30/12; 9/4/12; 4/29/13; 6/10/13 same OM
Separated 4/1/14
"Even a flicker of light will shine through darkness-12/25/2012"....better days ahead.
