You need an introduction to Bob? Well, I'm here to do it. Bob, meet my girlfriend, Zoo. Zoo, Bob is THRILLED to meet your acquaintance too!
Ok, so lets start with Bob's ideal time to pop in for a visit. Looking from your past few posts, coming home after work seems to be a mission critical time for you. You have had those wheels in motion all day and are ready and loaded for bear when your H walks through the door.
Bob really shines at this time of day. In fact: he LOVES it! Oh, and he said he doesn't care if your hair looks crappy and your makeup is long gone. He's still going to work fabulously with you.
What if....
You made a decision to put off whatever has been on your mind for awhile? You decide to act AS IF your H is going to be really THRILLED to see you (and given the fact that he's taking Dale's classes, he can't help but come home with a positive slant)?
So you muster up the energy to enthusiastically greet him when he walks through the door. You smile (a real smile, no fake ones accepted), walk over to him, put your arms around him and hug him while sneaking in a kiss. And you tell him how happy you are to see him?
Give it a try for a few days, and see how he responds.
Now realize that Bob isn't a long term solution, nor will he want to be a stand in for when you need to talk. But he will help the process move along if you let him.
Your in-between assignments will be to call him once a day (with Bob) and say hello AS IF he will be happy to speak to you.
Basically, you know this stuff. If your H is reacting to your edginess about things, he's going to play off of you. So if you and Bob get grounded, he's more apt to chat.
Am I so out of steam that I don't make sense? If so, bonk me on the head and I'll try to get with the program tomorrow.
Hugs!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
