Well, she doesn't like masturbation. When I admitted to it she felt hurt because I couldn't wait for her. She never masturbates and feels that we should hold out for each other, that if my hand is good enough why make love to her.
Hmmm, this seems like a lack of respect on her part. You told her how you felt about it, and she didn't accept that and asserted that her feelings about it were more important. It's your body, you should have the first word in how you treat it, and she should respect that unless you are doing something that is harming her or others. Is it okay if she tells you what to eat, how to dress, what kind of exercise is okay and what kind is not? Where does she end and you start?
You imply that there are other problems going on right now in your relationship, have you considered marriage counseling? This is one topic that is probably best discussed with a counselor present.
One suggestion would be for both of you to read MWD's book "The Sex-Starved Marriage" -- it's excellent, and will be good both for you and for your wife.
Accuray
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
