Also, think about the fact that the kids already really know what's going on deep down inside. My 4-year old (who never saw me fight with her father or witnessed any other overt discord) told me one day out of the blue that "I was going to kick Daddy right out of the house." Startled, I asked why she would say that and she said "because he is angry all the time and you don't kiss him on the lips." So they really do know. Another thing is that I dreaded telling my girls about the divorce and built it up in my mind so much that I could hardly get through it. Of course, by that time, when I actually told them it was much easier than I had anticipated. Just something to keep in mind.
