How do we live "together separate"?

[mizjjd]

I am sorry you are going through this.
Curious. Have any of his other wives left him?

AJ

He left his first wife (2 children together) after about 4 years of marriage. His second wife (1 child) left him after about 2 years of marriage. He still pines for W#2. His parents also left him when he was 16 or 17 years old. He apparently was not an easy teen and they moved overseas and left him under the care of one of his sisters. These were some of the issues I expected him to reference as "baggage", instead of it being everything about me.

To RegretfulLA

I am not sure what DB defines as cake eating? I mean, I understand the reference but am not sure what qualifies. If you were an outsider, or even an insider such as our kids I don't think you'd know anything was "wrong" or even different. H was never very affectionate to me - I was the initiator of hand holding, hugs & kisses etc. So now I don't initiate any more. In the first days I made our distance more obvious but was told by H that would defeat the purpose of bothering to stay together at all so unless I wished to expedite actual separation I should attempt to make things appear "normal".

He has gone from avoiding even accidental touch to last night spooning again.

The best way I can make sense of things is that "I've been given notice". My lease is up.

I would very much like to GAL, starting with getting a job. Easier said than done. I was a stay at home mom for 15 years. Never got a degree, so my job choices are rather limited. I worked retail for 5 years but in Feb my position was eliminated. I am on unemployment now and have been trying to get an office type job - or anything that doesn't have stupid retail hours. And now of course H too is unemployed, due directly to his MLC. It would be funny if it wasn't so terrifying.

To WenikiTiki

I have been doing lots and lots of reading and it does help. I will try to find the rules you mentioned.

Thanks to all who responded.