busted affair again!

[newman7977]

I'll think about it some more Newman. I'm not ignoring you.

But some things she does are not consistent with saying she wants to try.

which would confuse anyone, including you.

So let me ponder some more. But tell me this, what does SHE SAY she wants, NOW?

what does she mean when she says "She is trying" and what do YOU mean when you say she is?

25,

What she meant by "trying" is trying not to have anything to do with OM and that shes trying to get those feelings back you know the "in-love" feelings for me. When we talked R~4mos ago, she wanted to do those things back to me the kiss, affection etc...but she say she doesn't feel like it so why would she do it.

That's my argument to her before, that your not really trying because she's not initiating anything with me it's just me.

After the INILWY bomb, I begged her to try and we did dates once a month. We did for few months and she never got those feelings. But hats because she was entertaining OM.

What I did notice, is if my 6th sense is correct that when they W and OM were talking, she was really cold to me. OM really brainwashed her, heck my W did not just 180 but 360 in her thinking, and she's seem rebelling on "marriage" in general, that no one should be stuck in a M. Even her sister told me she's acting like the teenager more than D17...I never told her this, but you see the poison the OM is feeding her?

I know mind-reading but, I think sometimes we need to analyze the sitch. Anyway, going back to her complaints. It is clear to me now that anything I do doesn't matter, she told me so in one of those dates we did 4 mos ago, that if I would've done these changes a year before then maybe there was a chance--wtf is that mean, well that's the timeline before the OM. It is simply put "a little too late".

So guess what, I'm still doing these complaints even though it doesnt matter to her because these are what I recognize I've become. Especially with my kids, so I change not for her but for me and the kids. My problem is that I started to expect results, hope for R with W.

So do you see, i think I radiated my expectations here and I threw you off.

Heres some more of my analysis of he sitch, she told me that she can't commit and that even though we D, she's not gonna be with OM, partly I believe that because I don't think she will want to be far away from her kids OM lives far.

But I think what she wants in her life is the single life, independence and free to do whatever, and if she chooses to be with OM for the weekend she can do it. That's the bottom line I think she wants. They really feel like they were the true love that was stopped by moving separate ways when they were kids.

I really think she put a timeline in our R, I think she's "trying" so that she can tell everyone that she tried and her feelings never came back. So you see this is why I feel it doesn't matter what I do. It's really for me.

The only hope I have is the hope that phrase in here "believe half of what WAS would say".

I will cross the bridge when I get there, I know there's a fork in the road. But I think her timeline is 6 months from now. Either ways I'm ready reconciliation or D, I will be a better man then. I'm still shooting for miracles in that 6 months.

newman