Keep breathing...

[mamabird]

25, I was just thinking about Retrouvaille. Since we don't have an extra $150 a week right now for MC i may be able to get him to agree that way.

Anyway, I have to thank you and my other supporters here for the encouragement. I know you are right that I have to start expressing my wants and needs. I tried to start that conversation last night but he didn't want to talk then. He said to me at one point, "I'm still your H and until I'm not you need to honor that." So why does that not work in the reverse???

I agree that I am getting the short end of the stick and many people have said, enough is enough, you've paid your dues. If we can get some good intervention at this point (MC or Retrouvaille) that may work enough to get me back into the bedroom or get him back at the dinner table.

What happens is that whenever I try to express my point of view, he takes the standpoint that I am the guilty party, so he can get the upper hand. It's a power/control issue, plain and simple. We are not playing as a team, we are playing against each other - and that is not good. The problem is, when I stand up to him he sees that as "argumentative", so backing down is a 180 for me. The problem with that is, I'm screwed either way. I'm either an argumentative b!tch or I'm a doormat/martyr. I need a serious advocate.