Sounds like both you and your H have a bad case of not wanting to face up to responsibilities.... guilty of a similar problem in this M here.
Been reading The Road Less Travelled by M, Scott Peck and it talks about these kinds of things - not wanting to face up to our own responsibilities, and also taking on responsibilities that aren't even ours. Do try to get hold of this book. It's very perceptive!
Ignoring a problem will not make it go away!
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
