Studies in Feral Cats, part 4

[TSquared2]

Updating:

I got some new responsibilities at work, doing the sound for the college football coach's show, a nice (and fun!) change-up for me and nice to know I still have the skills and "ears" from my musician days. It is very deadlined and intense so it keeps my mind very focused on the present moment and not other things like my sitch, W, etc. And there is a nice energy being on campus...it's been so long I had forgotten.

We had a pretty good weekend, interactions and discussions went well. We even touched in small "bites" (thanks hrm!) the affairs and such, W had questions about some of "my stuff" about it (for lack of better way to phrase it). I reckon I got tested, got a chance to prove that I am not going to drag her through the mud and to the confessional about it, that I am moving forward and all. Since W has always projected most things into huge, catastrophic proportions, maybe this will help her ease her fear factors.

We seem to be working better as a team of parents. One "new" thing I noticed lately is that she has been complementing me on things I do, especially with the kids, my father skills are being validated and ....wait a minute...um...compliments...validation...she isn't DB'ing me now, is she??? *chuckle*

W is still pretty self-absorbed working through her stuff, still trying to control a lot of things that really aren't that big a deal. But, looking back at my own growth process, I can understand and not let it bother me. To each their own time and style of learning/growing, a nice thing to take away from this journey amongst so many lessons and growth.

Here is something I ran across by a female writer (with women as the target audience) trying to look into why I get "triggered" when W says she doesn't have "those feelings" for me:

"Physical intimacy is for men what emotional intimacy is for women."

Thoughts, discussion appreciated, as always...



T^2