Part of the problem is your expectations. You have them and should not. It's hard to break those habits though, especially when they act "nice". And I do mean act. It's more manipulation than anything else.
How can he keep track of the lies? I think the better question is "does he care to?" I think not. He is in it for himself and everyone else "is against him" in his eyes.
It doesn't have to be rational. It's why we think of MLC'rs as "aliens", right? They look like somebody we knew. But they sure as heck don't act like anyone we would be caught admitting to knowing
They will try just about anything to get what they want. Really. Him trying to intimidate you? That's par for the course. Heck, mine offered me sex if I would initiate the divorce at one point. She tried all kinds of manipulative behviors beyond that as well.
Stay calm. The first rule of negotiations is to remove the emotions from the negotiations. Your lawyer will tell you that if you ask. If you get sucked into the drama and emotions, you'll make a decision you may later regret. That's what your lawyer is for.
Stop listening to your H. Listen to your lawyer if he's good. There will be plenty of time later for the emotions. And don't let your H intimidate you. He has a lot to lose and very little he can take. At best, he can get 50/50 with the kids. He'll have to go through the state's fair and equitable distribution and that is usually non-arguable in most states.
Anger at him is one thing. Being angry and wanting it all done can cost you though. So be careful of that.
My $0.04 worth anyway,
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
