About to separate....

[dorightman]

So, the next day I was home with the w. She didn't want to talk about the M. We both did our separate stuff, then had dinner together as a family. She was friendly to me, but I noticed that when she said my name, it sounded like she was talking to her ex. Something about the tone and inflection of her voice when she said my name really put me off. Went to bed and woke up this morning 5:45am. She was up and went to the gym to work out before she had to go to work. I woke up and got emotional from being triggered the day before. I cried for an hour and wrote down all my thoughts on pieces of paper to give her when she got home. She came home, saw my face with tears and said, " I can't do this right now, I threw the papers at her and said"read these!. She went up to the bedroom to take a shower, I followed her up and said I want to see you read them. She read them , threw them in the garbage and said she couldn't do this right now because she had to get the kids ready for school. I lost it and yelled at her,"Make a decision, either tell me you want out and you want a D, or tell me you want to work on our problems together . She was crying and she said OK, I want out!. I lost it and threw my coffee cup down at the floor and it broke in a million pieces. Then I threw my glasses at the wall. She was freaked out and was scared of me. I felt bad and tried to console her but she said don't touch me. I said ok, I'm done and went to another room to cry some more. She
took a shower and woke up the kids and pretended everything was all right. Then she went to work and said she didn't know when she would be back. I called some friends and they told me that I acted normal for somebody in my sitch and not to feel bad. I called my therapist and went to see him a few hours later. After I told him the story, he said try not to get angry in front of W again, but he said it was ok to feel the way I feel. I know I have broke all the DB rules again, and I'm not sure if my W will start a D now or move out as a reaction to this. I hope neither, I hope that time will heal this and I can continue to DB. I feel like I might need to get out of the house for my own good. The in house separation thing is really difficult because I see the W too often and she's mean to me and pushes all the sensitive buttons. Any or all advice much appreciated!