sunshine78~ I just now saw your post Sunshine, sorry about that! I totally empathize with everything you have said! I know GALing is hard, but trust me there is really no other way. If you don't the thoughts, the loneliness, the depression will all suck the life out of you..... trust me been there done that, don't want to go back! Don't get me wrong, I have my moments still.... was feeling quite lonely last night, but I know it will pass and I know ultimately God wants what is best for me, so whether I like it or not I have to experience this part of the journey (trust me when I die there will be questions! LOL)
As for me, a lot of people in my life know now, but didn't at first, because, quite frankly, at first it was embarrassing. Now that I realize this really has nothing to do with me, and would have happened regardless, it's a little easier to let people in. It was also a bit easier once I was getting all the shocked WTF reactions from people, further cementing my life in Normalville and H's new address in Crazytown. There are still a lot of people who don't know, but my parents do, a few other family members, my friends and close co-workers. That works for me, it may not work for everyone. Just know you're not alone, and you can always count on the good people here to listen, give advice, cry with you or smack some sense into ya!
I also know this can take such a looooooooong time for them to work through, if ever. I'm coming up on a year next week and I can NOT believe it. In some ways it seems like yesterday, and others it seems like it's been forever.
wishing, hoping~ Exactly! Time for a change! Here's to getting to eat pizza WE really enjoy!! HAHA
reachingHigher~ Thanks RH! The hair cut was a big hit at work! Although, I was worried about the reaction of the children.... they did just stare at me for a little, but then I think they realized who I was! LOL
snodderly~ Funny you should mention the holidays, I was thinking about the same thing! I wonder if he is so stuck in replay it will be the same or not, who knows? I was also thinking of how much different they will be for me this year. Last year I spent them home alone, I cooked a big meal, just for me, it was pathetic really, but you have to remember I was only a few months from BD and still wasn't sure what was going on. I didn't even put up a Christmas tree!!! I will put one up this year and have no expectations, nothing else has jolted him back, but that doesn't mean I have to stop all of MY traditions because he's still lost in limbo land.
Updates~ I'm sure everyone is dying to know H's reaction to my new hair cut (ok, I may be being a bit dramatic there!) Anyway, he came home last night and I was sitting here at the computer. He went into his room, came out walked by said Hi to me and keep going.... a few seconds later he backed up looked in the room and said, "You did something to your hair?" He looked kinda stunned/shocked. I said yeah and spun around in the chair. He said, "Oh wow, that's different for you." Then he walked away. That was it. LOL I think he was so shocked he didn't know what to do or say so he tried to play it cool. He went to bed shortly after.
Later, around 10 I was turning off the tv in the bedroom and dropped the remote, it made a loud banging sound. He came running over and asked if I was alright. I told him I was, the remote had slipped out of my hand. He went back to his room. Strange.
This morning I did something, probably not DB, but hey why should he get to call all the shots, I may have seduced him (it didn't take much). Later before work I asked him if he would mind paying the cable bill this month too since I got my hair done. He said yeah if it will help you out. I said it will help me out, like I said, I did something for me, which I don't usually do so it would help me out a lot. He then asked when it was due. I told him it's either the 15 or the 11, I couldn't remember but I would look for him. He said he probably has an e-mail about it, he'll take care of it. So yea, he's paying the cable bill this month!!
Toothbrush, still in holder, however, bedroom door shut tight!! Also not home at typical after work time..... lots to think about with this sudden new hair!!
Also, thought it was funny my friend just texted me and said she wonders what H will do to top my hair.... she says green mohawk maybe? LMAO!!! Time will tell....
