This is what I did and I'm still not sure if it helped much but at least he is talking now?

I apologised for my behaviour and told H that I was ashamed of myself. I told him that I had figured out what was wrong and it was inexcusable for me to lay the brunt of it on him. I asked him if I had done too much damage and was told no. I also asked him if he was still happy and comfortable at the core of everything despite the past few days and he said yes. Throughout all of this the expression on his face went from "great, here we go again" to something a bit less grim.

That distance was still there though...just not so far away? Despite his assurance that everything was ok I couldn't get past his body language. It was too much like it was a year ago...when he was telling me that everything was fine and it wasn't That whole placation factor is looming large.

What can I say, I'm miserable and ashamed of myself...I hate when I get all whiny like this, it grates on my nerves. What a conundrum I have weaved this time around.

Zoo

"If patience is worth anything, it must endure to the end of time. And a living faith will last in the midst of the blackest storm." - Mahatma Gandhi