This chit is hard…really hard. IMO, the pain never really truly goes away. I believe that in time a scab is formed over the wound, which really enables us to keep moving forward in our lives. From time to time the scab may get ripped off (i.e. a trigger that makes you feel the pain again) but we all learn to heal again.
You SHOULD not be EMBARRASSED. On the contrary, you should be proud.
Maybe your next move is step down. I’ll agree but I will also say, that your next steps could (if you really allow them to be) steps forward and HIGHER.
Take as much time as you need to grieve but try not to get “stuck” there. For me I found that when I look at the past, I try to focus on the positives of what once was. Nothing that my XW says to me, the kids, her family, friends….could ever take away the good times. Is it sad to see the person that she has become? Yeah, but at the same token maybe just maybe she is happy being that person. If she is, then God Bless her.
The more you really focus on healing and becoming happy the farther the past gets. You cannot relive, cannot do a “do over”…you just need to keep going. As Brooklyn used to say…keep on keepin!
(((hugs))))
Oh…and IB…it really does get better!
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
