After further reflection I realized that all I do around the house is wash the clothes and load the dishwasher. The house has been a mess for awhile and I decided that a 180 (and just taking care of myself) would be to do a big cleaning today since I'm home alone.
Other than telling her what I like about her and why I was drawn to her in the beginning during last nights talk I've stopped compliments. I won't be saying "I love you" or giving compliments, though I will say "thanks" if she does something nice for me.
Last night she felt trapped. She said she wasn't comfortable staying but felt I would permanently kick her out (with her having no place to go) if she didn't spend the night. She told me that she had really wanted to just spend the weekend at her dads. Since she said those things I decided that a 180, and being supportive of her decision, was to tell her that she should go stay with her dad. I didn't want her feeling uncomfortable and trapped. I figured it was a way to show support and love because it isn't what I wanted but it was what she wanted. I'll be supportive if she decides to spend nights away and I'll be quietly appreciative if she decides to stay at home.
Any ideas about doing stuff around the house? I cleaned up today because I was sick of the mess. When she is here should I offer favors (she is an "acts of service" kind of person, she likes it when I do the little things) or will that be chasing right now? I'm afraid that if I do a 180 on that and stop offering favors or responding positively when she asks for a favor that she'll just feel I'm being cold and pissed off.
“People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Abraham Lincoln
