eyesopen, you have reached a critical point. I fully understand what you are going through now. I have been there in April and know the trembling hands. My first advice would be: try to stay as calm and detached as possible, don't let any anger spiral out of control. What will happen now depends on your "compass". The majority of people think that a divorce is the only proper response to infidelity. I would have said so, too, before I married and the children were born. But now I think differently. It is not only the relationship with my wife which is at stake but the whole family. I want to do all I can to save the family. It has higher importance than what any single member is doing. It's a decision you'll have to reach yourself. Nobody will blame you if you file for divorce. If you decide to fight for your M be prepared to be all alone. People will ridicule you as being a "doormat", probably only very few friends will support you. In my view it's the much tougher route. All the best, whichever way you'll choose.
