Hi Zoo,

The psychologist in me is curious...

Has your Mom always sought to be the centre of attention? Been rather dramatic (that frying pan!!! ), emotionally manipulative? Kind of shallow? Blame shifting?
Strong sense of "entitlement"?

Its just that these traits are more common and extreme in certain personality disorders...NOT to say your mom has one (I think I've been wrapped on the knuckles for "BB diagnosis" enough to know better than to suggest that!!!)

It's just that it's MUCH harder (not impossible) for folks who DO have these traits to see their own role, to take responsibility etc, and I feel your anguish at her just not "getting it".

There are secondary pay offs for staying the same: attention, control, sympathy (although this can wear thin).

What really got my attention was your comment about her LYING to her therapists and feeling good about "getting one over on them"...

Shiny