Letting people live their lives and GALing...

[AntoniaB]

Well that turned out to be a huge bust. Had a second date. Awkward from the get-go. Could not put my finger on it at first but something about the guy was progressively seeming more and more "off." At some point he launched into some sexual comments/language/profanity that really came out of nowhere and just seemed inappropriate for the conversation considering I barely knew him. I was kind of unnerved/uncomfortable, so I sort of turned away from him in my seat and just acted more detached, figuring I'll sit here awhile longer, make my excuses about working tomorrow, then leave. So I did. I just had this radar going off like crazy that something wasn't quite right.

I got home and an hour later he emailed a long very manipulative email where he admitted to having scrutinized all my body language all night, reading me from my every move. From this he decided I was only interested in being friends. Well, from the beginning, I'd said I was only capable of something serious if I grew to have a friendship and trust with someone, so yes, this was true. But then he started in on what was it I said or did to "turn you off" and that sort of thing, and then also begged me to tell him that he was MISreading him, yadda yadda. Just felt like the email was creepy, I really did.

I replied short and sweet saying "I think I'm just not ready for a relationship and it was nice to meet you, thanks again for dinner." This wasn't good enough. He came back at me again with lots of smiley faces and winks, in another email wanting to know exactly what it was that he did so he could "learn" from it. I thought I'm not engaging in this game. He knows where I work. He feels a bit predatory to me. I'm trying to diffuse any potential problem. So I say "it's not you it's me. I guess I just didn't realize that I wasn't ready for a relationship till talk seemed to drift from friendly chit chat to other things." (by other things I meant his intrusive sexual questions of me). He emailed again saying "well I don't see anything that wasn't entirely innocent, I mean our conversation was no different than the conversations I have with my friends."

But you don't ask someone you JUST MET about whether their first sexual experience post-divorce is "wild" and "crazy" and if you found yourself doing deviant things. And I'm not about to bring this up with him. I'm afraid he'll keep bugging me or worse yet, show up where I work.

I've stopped returning his emails. I'm entirely weirded out by this and now I swear I will NEVER go on another online date as long as I live. I realize there may be nice people out there but this was just bizarre. I'd rather be alone.