He came and stayed with the kids on Tuesday night. Turns out what I thought was him being concerned and interested was actually him being self serving. He took the opportunity to rummage through everything and take what he wanted. I still do not know what all he took. I'm pretty angry about that. Basically, I told him, if he continues to do that, he would not be able to come stay here with them. He would have to wait and do traditional visitation.

Of course, he was all nice the whole time though. Made a fool of me. I mistook his actions as being caring and even went so far as to say- "Obviously you still care and this is where you want to be so why are we doing this?"

I guess he knew I was tired and wouldn't notice half the damn house missing that night.

The next day, he was his same old nasty piece of work. I talked to him around lunch time while I was on my way to a job interview. He was nasty and rude basically said, I am going to go eat my lunch in what little bit of time I have left. I don't have time for you. So I simply said, I'm sorry you feel you wasted your time talking to me and hung up.

He is supposed to come over tonight to basically have a discussion with our kids. Needless to say they are not adjusting well at all. Not at all. I had hoped it would be beneficial for us to talk to them together without anger and explain expectations. I really think at this point it is a mistake and I should cancel.

The girls already have their appt with the C this afternoon. So I don't know if that would be too much. Who knows though, maybe there will be more information that needs to be shared.

I can't explain it, but somehow, yesterday something in my mind changed. I think his nastiness again, caused me to detach more. I actually don't want to see him. At all. I want to avoid him. Perhaps, that is part of my motivation in wanting to tell him not to come. I just don't know.

My PMA otherwise is pretty good. I have the job offer I think. He said" I am inclined to hire" if we do not have enough info you will get an email requesting more for a back ground check. If you don't get that email it means we have enough and will contact you in 7-10 days once it is completed. School has been going well, I have gotten to reconnect with old friends that I haven't really talked to in ages. I lost 10 lbs. and my house is getting cleared out.
This might sound dumb but the house was a big deal. I don't know if it was H's depression or what but he seemed to bring clutter with him. Then I wouldn't do anything about it because I thought he would just get mad if I did. So now, it is coming out, and each room I clean out the better I feel!! I know that the house has bothered me for a long, long time. It was also a major point of conflict for the two of us. He would do this back and forth with it. Complain it was a mess, never help, and then get mad if we got rid of anything. So now that cycle is broken and the kids and I are doing the Flylady thing. They are flinging their butts off! lol

So that was my update. I'm still just doing my thing. Life IS getting better. I have moments when I am lonely and want to talk to him. Then I remember that really I never know which side of him I am going to get and I no longer have the desire to be talked to like crap so it goes away.

I hope everyone is doing well here. I am going to read a couple of threads. Have a good day all!