I am doing everything she says to do I still do my chores around the house, still make dinner 3 nights a week - we always spend Sundays together going to church etc.
DB 101 – if something is not working change it. Obviously doing the chores is not working for you. So try something different. I did this dude, made dinner, was pretty much the sole care giver, made breakfast in the morning. All of it was done to GET A DIFFERENT response from my XW. It did not work. If you are going to do things like chores, dinners, etc. Do them IF YOU want to NOT expecting anything from your W.
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"HEY IF WE ARE SEPERATING WHY ARE WE PUTTING IN A NEW KITCHEN AND BATHROOM"
“WE”….right now chance are there is no “WE”. There is HER and YOU are in the way. Personally, you need to step back and think about YOU and the kids! That does not mean be an as*hole to her – nope. It means that you DETACH from her craziness, which trust me, nothing you will be able to do about it.
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She told me not to go dark just be the best husband and father I can be.
I agree with this ^^^…especially the best father piece. So what does the “best husband” mean to YOU? Does best husband mean that you put your needs aside? Does it mean that you sit around feeling like a punching bag? What does it mean to YOU?
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My DB coach says that there is still hope
There is ALWAYS HOPE buddy. HOPE though…IMO, is not based on the actions of someone else.
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she also says this will take a long time but we have to take babysteps
Long time may be an understatement. Are you committed to seeing this through to the end? Don’t post the answer..keep that to yourself – you will need to refer back to it later. So Sunny, aside from your W what else can you tell me about you? What hobbies do you have? What do you do for a living? What dreams and goals to you have for you life?
God Bless, Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
