Back to Square One?

[Wendylon]

Thank you very much, Starsky, Tumbling and SD for writing in. It's really nice to hear from you.

Starsky, on the subject of hiring a private investigator, do you think that knowing the facts would change how I'd deal with the sitch? I'm torn on this one and worried that it might be quite expensive. I'm also scared I'll get sucked into wanting to know more and more detail.

On the flight back from Canada I was full of resolve about detaching and 180s but it's harder when the triggers are right in front of me. So far so good though in terms of my overt behaviour. I haven't commented on the fact that H was out last night (supposedly a family that he consults for invited him for supper) and will be out tonight (supposedly an old friend wants to see him for supper). I haven't mentioned that I can smell that he's been drinking every day for the last few weeks.

[I did, however, comment yesterday that my S17 smelled of alcohol and it went down very badly in that he told me not to be obnoxious. I didn't think I was being obnoxious I was surprised because it was 8.30 pm and he'd just come back from swimming. It turns out that he and friends had gone to a pub to celebrate a friend's 18th birthday before he'd gone swimming. (Here you can drink after 16 if with food and with someone over 18). I sometimes feel that I could do with applying DB principles in my R with S17. I find him difficult.]

Back to H, he did say that it was nice to have me back 'malgré tout' (despite everything). It's a phrase we've used a lot in our R so it's sort of an inside joke. I wonder how much he meant the 'despite everything' bit.

As you say, SD, let's get it right this time. I will keep checking in here as I know how much it helped last time. This community really is a godsend