I admire the effort you place into and passion you still have for your relationship. You and I share slightly similar situations in that my W also does not open up ever and never provided any hints of a teetering R. Even as I go back and look for clues now they are few and far between. I wish I had worldly advice but seem to get more form you than I am able to give for now as I am learning. That being said, I pray for you and continue to support you from afar.
Keep fighting the good fight...
M:44 W:41 M: 12 yrs W's EA began 3/12 Somewhere between WAW and MLC Still in same house