If you're detached enough, it won't matter. You might have a momentary "D@mn!" but then its gone.
If you're detached you could go out on a date every night with her and you wouldn't be an emotional roller coaster based on what she said or did.
You're putting your whole future with her on this one date, that's a lot of pressure. If you were truly detached this would just be a fun get together, not your whole future.
She knows you don't want a D. There's no need to bring it up.
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
You, and we, know you will not be able to NOT discuss the future. You keep saying you won't but you keep asking her to date you. You continue to put pressure on her to do what YOU want. She tries but then decides she's done.
If you keep this up, not respecting her, you may find her next "done" is her final one. Stop pushing your agenda on her. You're not listening.
M:63 H:53 S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23 M:15 T:16
Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways." H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12 12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing
No not detached. Part of me is ok with the divorce and part of me wants to keep trying. I feel like i am in the atarting phase of acceptance. Yes i have made this date sound like a lot of pressure but in truth it is really to just have fun. Sure i have hopes and always will.
So you have answered my question and i thank you. No Future talk at end if night. If she shows up it will be nice and we have fun if she cancels then i will be ok with that too. Friday i fade into sunset and start to move on with life as a single Dad.
Thanks again it helps!
M-45 W-44 2D - 11&13 2SS - 11&17 Married 10/10/10 Bomb 3/5/12 Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12 Back together 9/12 Seperated 6/13 Divorce Final 11/13/13
So i know i am making this harder that it has to be. If you look a bunch of posts back you will see that I agreed with her and was supporting her decision to move forward with what she wanted. The i recived a reaponce that made me feel like i had given up and i should not really be so supportive about the divorce and i could still save my marriage. That kind of sent me into spiral and trying to make this date more than it is.
I am sure i over thought the comments and made more of it than i should have. So now back full circle. I need to be at peace with how things are and if i see her tomorrow then i will simply have fun.
That would be my advise. Go out have fun. No R talk. No future talk. Just have fun and no expectations.
M-45 W-44 2D - 11&13 2SS - 11&17 Married 10/10/10 Bomb 3/5/12 Moved 5 houses away 4/20/12 Back together 9/12 Seperated 6/13 Divorce Final 11/13/13
