best and worse thing to ever go through

[eyesopen]

Had a good weekend. Took the kids to a friends cabin on Friday night, a little chilly but the kids love running around in the woods. I love watching them play.

Not sure if I mentioned this before, but I turned my basement into a studio apartment. My renters moved in today. It will allow me to stay in the house and support my W. Although last week my W mentioned that she has been thinking about us, but does not want to return to this house. I coud care less about the house, a home is were the family is.

Having a hard time with the patience aspect lately. My faith and hope are strong, jsut want to be together again. I know it may not happen, it's just hard to wait for closure either way.

My W, kids and MIL stopped by tonight. W said the kids wanted to see my renters. My renters are a couple that both work with my W. So my kids have met them before. Not sure if I mentioned this either, but my mom also works with my W. Oh, the soap opera we live in. Anyway as they were leaving and I was saying goodbye to the kids, my W and I caught each others eyes. It's hard to say I love you, and you are going to miss out on a great life with me at the same time with just a look. Hopefully I pulled it off.

Question, W says she needs to be completly self supporting before myself or anyone else can enhance her happiness. As of right now I pay her car insurance, and the loan payment. The car I drive is paid off. She is still under my medical insurance, although it wouldn't make it any cheaper for me if she wasn't on my plan. Just not sure if I should push her to get her own insurance? She wants me to take the car, so that I would pay her more per month in support. I think as long as we are still married, she should have to cover half of the payment. Things seem very well between us and I don't really want to upset that. Thinking I will stick with the status quo until she brings it up.

Just my thoughts for the night.