I think the thing I was asking about earlier in terms of good marriages, is that I think a lot of people try to present me with unrealistic ideas of love, and I was just wondering how those hold up in real marriages.
I do realize I need to be "in love" - etc. And that ExBF and I have what seems to me an extraordinary amount of issues.
And yet... I've never actually been in a relationship when I didn't have an extraordinary amount of issues with someone.
Everything with him - money, sex, communication.
And yet, we're here, trying. I think there's something to be said for that.
Did other relationships just come together and things worked out? On all fronts? On one or two? Were sex lives always just good or needed to be tweaked or ... KWIM?
If I had some encouragement, like my H and I worked through years of stuff, and now we're solid or - IDK -
He and I are *just now* talking about relationship stuff - (we did in the past but it was all so overwhelming - neither of us even knew how codependent and messed up we were until we had a kid)... and it was a clusterf*** - ppd, anger, withdrawal, sleep deprivation.
It's just hard enough to sort out anything - and even with love and respect, all these other things have to be working, no? Or ... does love and respect just kind of work things out?
