1. Take some time to read over and reflect on what you have written so far. Recall the grievances and any disliked aspects of yourself you may have been projecting onto the resented other. Review the call for love, the hurts, the feelings and needs both in the other and in yourself. Then recall the loving aspects of this relationship: memories of appreciation, satifsfactions and gratitude. Do not judge yourself if you have difficulty doing this. Just be aware of whatever thoughts and feelings are present. Let all the related issues, thoughts and feelings wash over you.
2. Now ask some questions of yourself: a. what is this really about? What is the main problem? What is the core issue here? You may discover something new.
b. What would it look and feel like if this matter were all resolved? Try to picture a situation in which healing has happened that is reasonable and realistic.
c. What needs to happen to move this matter in the direction of healing, harmony and growth?
What is a good small step in the right direction for this matter? Ask and wait with expectancy...believing that our wise inner self on some level knows how we are best to proceed.
Take as long as you need and write down what you come up with.
3. Look at your ideas and see if there is one you feel most drawn to right now. Make a commitment to yourself to follow through on whatever action would move the idea forward. Some examples of possible next steps are:
Share with the person any appreciations, loving thoughts you are drawn to share
Choose to work on a projected disliked aspect of yourself
Approach the person with your experience of this process Etc.
REPEAT AS NEEDED!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
