AS, I know what you mean about not comparing - except, this is really helpful to me.
I have a lot of crap around relationships and I'm trying to heal but it's like when I had a severe eating disorder, and as I was healing, I literally followed my mother around and watch what she ate - I had to relearn to feed myself basically.
I know everyone wants "the best for me" but I look at other relationships and most people I know are divorced, remarried and repeating, or on the rocks... why should my EXBF be held to these criteria that I don't even see anyone else who is married doing. SO that's why I'm asking what's realistic?
Like do people with good working marriages mess up and fail and do it again? Do they try? Do they grow? Do they lose respect over some things and maybe regain it? Do they get super annoyed and find annoying traits in the other person? Do they argue and then later apologize, try to learn new skills? IDK. If so, then maybe we have a chance. Otherwise, I might be holding too high a standard and possibly turning my back on a potentially really good thing.
