What upsets me most is not that he wants to D, is that he does not want to try. No Retrouvaille, no MC, no anything. He said he already tried and he is done trying.
LA, I've heard the same thing about MC, and I know my H has a good reason not to go in his mind. He also told me that he's been trying and it tired of it, but I honestly don't know what that means other than putting up with my sh!t. And I feel the same way that you do. I'm sad that right now he won't commit to trying. I am going to brin gup Retrouvaille in an email when he is gone in 2 week.
But I don't believe that he is truly done. I know that I am not happy with the current state of affairs, but I see a few small things.
I wouldn't take his watching the Daily Show too personally, he probably didn't know how to handle all of what just happened. I would try to see what happens over the next few days while you are away. You've said your peace, even though it was not exactly in DB style, and you probably feel a lot better getting it out of your system. I'm afraid to meltdown in front of him at this point, and when I do, I can't tell him all of it.
When W of A is one of your LL and you are being rejected, it hurts. Trust me, I know. I told H I am within 5 lbs of my weight on the day we got married. No response. That's a small example. And this can become self consuming and destructive.
Are you still out trying to take walks? Please try to get in a walk or some other exercise. I found myself totally thinking about other things on the treadmill yesterday, and then I teared up for a minute, and went back to enjoying my 30 minutes of peace. Snuggle with the dog. They don't complain, talk back and love you no matter what.
M44 H57 D17 (special needs) M 18 yrs Bomb 7/2/12 Still living together
