Your wife wanted to separate and that is what it should be. I know it is difficult but you are right to focus on yourself right now and go dim. Separation is just that. I hope me and my wife do not separate but if we do I am going to keep focusing on my changes and my kids and building a new life.
Patience is the hard part - Amen to that! It is not my strong suit either. I have been reading a bit about mindfulness and living in the moment. It takes the edge off of the uncertainty of the future.
I have realized in my relationship that my W and I are going through different things. My wife has acknowledged my changes but has a hard time as seeing them as permanent. I never did not love my wife so it was easy, once I realized my relationship was at death's door, to change quickly and permanently. It took my wife years to get to the point that she wanted to leave. She says she does not love me anymore and I believe her. I changed because of love and she has to fall back in love, if she can. It sounds like you are kind of in the same spot and it is not a great place to be but the recognition that we are on different paths has helped me.
