Denver, thanks friend. I've been missing your wisdom. Tori, yes, it's wierd. The WAS have their script, and evidently so do we.
So here's an email that I received shortly ago. I read it, as I had the curiosity and strength to try and see what it is was about.
"Hi,
I realize you don’t like getting these emails at work, but honestly we have kids crawling all over us all hours of the day. Maybe we can chat about the contents of this email later, but I need to spew it here, so stop reading now if you don’t want to look at this at work.
Several items
I need a bed. Do you know what your face and arms look like when you sleep on that couch for extended amounts of time? I wake up looking like I’ve spent the night in a waffle iron. Are you willing to help me get a bed? I do not want to take time out of your weekend, but I wanted to go to IKEA this weekend. I will probably have to go Saturday in the morning because my guess is that I’m watching NIECE on both Friday and Saturday evening. Can we switch vehicles so you can still do your own thing? Neither Dad, SD’s or BFF’s truck will make it out there, and I know OM has a truck and would help me, but I won’t have to go there unless you refuse to help me.
I want to purchase a headboard and frame for me and then a bunk bed and one twin mattress for the boys. I will also have to purchase a twin bed set for one of the boys too. S2 may be cool with dinos and S7 may be in need of another one. I am willing to go to the little place NEAR HOME to look for mattresses and I could do that Friday after school or even in the afternoon, but I am hesitant and you know why (BED BUGS). I realize that this may be a good 500 expense, but at this point I want to get separate houses and maybe if we had separate bedrooms and I felt like I actually had a place to sleep I may feel a bit different.
Lawyers – not seeing one this week. There’s too much going on.
House scenarios.
Please let me know which of these scenarios would work best for you and you have to choose one. A -You keep the house and buy me out of the equity.
B -I keep the house and buy you out of the equity.
C - We sell the house (could take up to three or more years) and split the profit. At some point during this scenario we will probably move and one or the other will be responsible for the mortgage. The one living in the house is responsible, but that would have to be written into the decree.
D- One of us stays in the house while it is on the market and the other moves out. Once the house sells, the profit (if any) is split.
Dog -I say we get one…soon."
My gut response / somewhat thought of response is to lend her my truck as a friend. She does seem to be trying to back me into the corner though by using OM. (Side note--OM lives 3 hours away, IKEA is an 1 hr each way from our house. W has said OM doesn't have a car / truck of his own, I've made it clear that he is not allowed at our house again provided I live there). As far as all the purchases, where will that money come from? Our joint acct or hers that she intends on setting up. Rightfully, it shouild be from hers. I do must admit, I do like the idea of her "feeling different if she had more space," or is that simply a ploy. I say a ploy as she quickly jumps to lawyers and possible sell of the house. How come she is making me choose. She choose this scenario. I can narrow down the choices for her, as I'm not going to buy her out. Per my L, unless it's written in a decree, we are both still responsible for the mortgage payment regardless if someone lives outside of the home. Again the dog thing? How come she is all of a sudden so pro-dog? She's been dragging her feet with that idea for more than 6 months. Now that she has an interest, does that mean if we do D, that we'll have joint custody of the dog???
I'm not panicking about all of this, as I probably would have, but again, definitely want some guidance in how to prepare for this discussion.
