Your discussion with your wife has two sides. It's good that you have clearly shown your boundaries. I assume you are well aware of the fact that now that you have established them you must follow through and enforce them, if need be. The weakness I see is your anger. Diffusing it is very difficult, I know. But in my view your message would have an even better impact if you delivered it calmly. Treat your wife like a co-worker. Polite, friendly, detached. Good luck.
