Dropping the rope, hope I'm doing the right thing.

[scaredsilly]

well, i sent H the remaining list of things i need in a mate, should i have one. this is his response:

"I wanted to let you know that I opened your attachment ( I was a little nervous) last night before leaving and read through it a couple of times last night. :(, it seems that I have been truly horrible to you, for that I am so sorry. Thank you for telling me all of it, though. I need to know all of it. I will promise you this, to read again, 5 a night, and work those 5 through my head until I complete…

Thank you again. I am sure it was hard for you to say to me so thank you again..."


i, again, was surprised by his response. he is obviously thinking about some of his responsibility in the mess we've made of our marriage. however, i wonder how his position can change so quickly? maybe he feels like i did when i became the LBS; i would have done anything to keep our marriage together. but i was not even ready back then. i hadn't grown enough nor learned enough.

what worries me is i have never really given him an in-depth look at how miserable i was, as he gave me in his spew after the bomb. i didn't want to give him a "tit for tat" grocery list of grievances that would seem purely defensive. but without that, how can he know what i need? my list of mate qualities is not really specific.

should i let him read my writings on things that caused me to pull away from him? some are sad, some are angry, some contain both emotions.

or should i do it with a MC present, should this all lead to R?

opinions greatly appreciated.