Stop the ride I want to get off

[Tumbling]

Help!
Here I am on holiday but freaking about not hearing from H so I'm posting here instead of contacting him. This feels different to other times.

At least he finally let me know he was ok last wk & I was detached saying thanks for letting me know. And a couple of hours later he txt that he missed me (good sign) but he considers himself a terrible person. I felt bad for him so I thought I should reply but now its been 3 days since I heard from him.

Did I say the wrong thing?
Am I right to leave it?

In the past I've continued to pry the door open w friendly txts but I'm worried this time that my silence will continue to make him feel bad - as well he shld perhaps w these hurtful/confusing actions but I'm not sure feeling guilty is a good thing for the sitch. Unless it helps him look at himself...? I know I can't fix him but my action/non action could break him more...

I don't want to get into another pursue (me) avoid cycle so I guess I have to tough it out but is he going to pick up the ball?

Perhaps this is a good 4-6wk experiment. That's a positive way to look at it, isn't it?

And after the anni no show we eventually had friendly txts & then he went away on business & neither of us txt for 5 days. It was him who initiated txtng then & he told me he kept checking his phone so maybe that's what he's doing now - unlikely he's out of the country on business again this wk.

I guess I'm looking for reassurance that I'm not doing the wrong thing by not sending friendly txts this time.

Anyone?

Thanks, Tumbling

PS I've thought all along that this was more about him than us. Although I worked on stuff I did wrong when we were together - needed to grow up really - he has said he thinks he's in crisis, staggering around in a nightmare, doesn't know why he does the things he does, just needs abit more time to get head sorted, its killing him that he is doing this to me & that my understanding & patience makes things worse...so a touch of mlc