Tomorrow is a New Day

[hopefulinga]

Despite my good start this morning, I now feel like an emotional wreck. I feel broken and sad. If I saw H right now, I think I would break down in tears.

I am not thinking about H and POW and whatever may be going on, if anything. I think today I feel like mourning the death of my M. I almost feel like giving up.

I think the breach of trust, after H has yelled at me for not trusting him over the years, and the dishonesty are what have gotten to me today. It's like a punch in the stomach.

Maybe this will be good for the letting go. I'm just afraid I will not be able to keep up the joyful experience around him.