"I actually told my wife that I would not be in a M where OM was involved in any fashion a couple of weeks after she moved back in."
this is a boundary without a consequence, hence, it's no boundary at all.
Agreed. I was hesitant to set the boundary truly, but did so after much advice from here. And as said, when she busted thru that boundary, I was ready to file for D as I didn't see any other option forward. I only backed off of it after discussing with a DB coach. In fact, my coach suggested the next time W was on the phone with OM, I say something like "tell OM I said hey."
And I'm just passing that advice forward, as I don't think hopeful is ready to force the issue either.
