Stand up. Poor and tired, but more than this.

[LIO]

Journal: Stealing from Cadet's post for a reminder:
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Reconnection starts with things, animals, children and we are last.

So this could be part of the script.
All you can do is treat him like a squirrel.
No sudden movements that might scare him away.
Consistent actions is more important than anything else.
Keep up your changes and have more patience.
_________________________

H came over, fixed the door jamb. I made a joke about it which he took well. He apologized for the door, I apologized for reading her posts and despite him not contacting her, making her words HIS action. I told him I would not read her posts, and her words are NOT his and I was wrong and ruined the whole day. He got uncomfortable. He left shortly after (his intention anyhow). And here I am.

I texted him thank you for the door. I will not be contacting him again. (Yes Kat, I DO mean it.)
What worked for the last couple of weeks was I was low drama and the other girl was high drama. She still is. I can't handle the anxiety and stress and I need to back off NOW. Also, H acknowledged that the 2 weeks he didn't 'fight', neither did I. Life just flowed. It was nice and no stress.

Ok. Back to square one.
--What do I want out of life?
--I am avoiding what?
--What have I been missing out on for the last 2 years?